Eight Fascinating Ways to Pitch Editors and Agents

This week I’m at the excellent Blue Ridge Christian
Writers Conference
in the Blue Ridge Hills Mountains. 
One of the continuing tracks I’m teaching is Marketing 101 – 401 which teaches—among other things—the most
effective techniques for pitching editors and agents.
But my methods might be wrong. Some of the conferees seem to have adopted the following (different) techniques when trying to impress an editor or agent:
  1. Pitch editors and agents in the bathroom if possible. It’s where
    they’re most vulnerable, thus most open to suggestions.
  2. If you get a chance to sit next to an editor or agent at a meal,
    scoot your chair so close they’ll feel like they’re in the middle of a CAT
    scan. They like feeling close to writers.
  3. If you have a 15 minute appointment with an editor or agent, make
    sure you talk for at least 14 of the 15 minutes.
  4. Be sure to ask editors and agents inane questions that could
    easily be answered with a little research on the internet. They like being
    asked these questions over and over again.
  5. When it’s your turn to speak at a meal where there are
    other aspiring writers, don’t talk in short sound bites. Talk in long run
    on sentences—without taking a breath if possible. This proves to an editor
    or agent you have enough words to write a full length novel.
  6. Before and after your appointment, lurk in your favorite editor or
    agent’s peripheral vision so they know you’re serious about working with
    them. Editors and agents don’t think of this as stalking, they think of it
    as persistence.
  7. When they ask for your proposal hand them one that’s a little beat up with two or three strategically
    placed coffee stains. This shows you’re a true artist.
  8. Whenever you say their name, pronounce it wrong. This will provide loads
    of laughs in the years to come when you reminisce about your first meeting.
Any other fascinating methods of pitching you’ve seen? Talk to me.
James L. Rubart is
the best-selling and award winning author of ROOMS, BOOK OF DAYS, THE CHAIR,
SOUL’S GATE, and releasing in August, MEMORY’S DOOR. During the day he runs
Barefoot Marketing which helps businesses and authors make more coin of the
realm. In his free time he dirt bikes, hikes, golfs, takes photos, and
occasionally does sleight of hand. No, he doesn’t sleep much. He lives with his
amazing wife and teenage sons in the Pacific Northwest and still thinks he’s
young enough to water ski like a madman. More at www.jameslrubart.com