Anita Mellott continues to wait on the Lord as she homeschools and writes. She blogs “Words of Encouragement and Hope” at From the Mango Tree.
“Why is waiting so hard?” I sighed as I glanced at the calendar. Weeks had stretched into months without any word from editors or agents. I knew waiting was an inescapable part of life, especially that of a writer’s. Yet my anxiety and agony deepened.
Dejected, I picked up my Bible and began flipping through the Psalms. Here was a writer who understood the angst of waiting; but anticipation, even exultation coursed through each Psalm. “How could he be so jubilant in the midst of waiting? How could I “wait in expectation?” I wondered (Ps 5:3).
My curiosity piqued. I began to search the Scriptures and a common theme emerged: “We trust in the name of the LORD our God” (Psalms 20:7). “O LORD, the king rejoices in your strength,” “For the king trusts in the LORD” (Psalms 21:1, 7). As the truth of the Psalmist’s source of strength began to soak into my heart, I embarked on a slow journey from self-absorbed waiting to…
1. A place of rest: The turning point came on my knees. After several rounds of correspondence with an editor and a publisher’s marketing director, the futility of my striving sank in. As I surrendered my writing journey and its outcome to Him, powerlessness gave way to trust; anxiety turned into peace. I could rest in His sovereignty. He knew best. “My soul finds rest in God alone… Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him” (Psalm 62:1, 5).
2. A place of renewal: The months of silence and then the sting of rejections launched a relentless assault on my strength. As doubts attacked my mind, I clung to Isaiah 40:31: “But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint.” Somewhere along the way, renewal began to spark. It didn’t come in the tangible form of a contract, but rather a gentle whisper, “Keep writing the book.” These words ignited a deep excitement and eagerness. I could soar on the wings of His creativity, assured that the One who called me is faithful.
3. A place of faithfulness: Waiting isn’t to be a place of stagnancy. Rather it’s a time when faith is tested and perseverance determined. I had a choice–to allow the tentacles of doubt and anxiety to tighten their stranglehold on me or to “travel steadily along his path” (Psalm 37:34; NLT). It wasn’t the outcome that mattered, but my obedience and willingness to walk the path He had chosen for me.
And so, “My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior…His mercy extends to those who fear him, from generation to generation. (Luke 1:46-47; 50).